1000s OF USES: PART 9 – AND MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU TOO

I’m pleased to say Michelle loved the Christmas card I sent her. She just sent me an email:

Hi James,

I just wanted to say thanks very much for the Christmas card – a nice surprise to get one from a customer – thank you!

Your 1000s of uses query was no problem at all. I love to receive letters from our customers – good or bad. It gives us valuable feedback and it may sound like a cliché, but you’re the people that matter and why we are here.

Anyway, I’m a self confessed Blu-Tack nerd and could talk about Blu-Tack all day (and generally do).

I hope you have a great Christmas and receive many Christmas cards that you can stick on the walls with Blu-Tack (another use) – in fact if you send me your address I’ll send you a free pack with my compliments.

Kind Regards
Michelle

I’m genuinely touched.

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1000s OF USES: PART 8 – MERRY CHRISTMAS

After all of her hard work, I thought it would be nice to send Michelle a Christmas card. I put quite a lot of thought into picking the card. I didn’t want to send something which would make me look silly. She respects me. I wanted something quite serious.

I think I made a good choice. This is what I wrote inside:

Dear Michelle,

Many thanks for all your help and patience in looking into my “1000s of uses” query.

I wonder how many uses this card has. Not as many as Blu-Tack, I am sure!

Merry Christmas and a happy New Year!

James

I possibly overdid it with the exclamation marks, but maybe it’s OK. It’s Christmas. Surely you’re allowed an exclamation mark or two at this time of year.

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1000s OF USES: PART 6 – GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS

The last few days have been something of a roller-coaster of emotions for me, as I continue my struggle to establish whether or not there really are thousands of uses for Blu-Tack.

Firstly, having recovered from my shocking discovery, I contacted UHU. Their English language site is still under construction, and although they have a very small UK site, the contact form on their website doesn’t seem to work very well (or at all), and I wasn’t able to find an email address. As a result, I had no choice other than to fill out the Kontaktformular on the German website:

Hi,

I recently bought a pack of UHU White Tack and noticed that according to your packaging, White Tack has “thousands of uses”. I was just wondering if you perhaps had a list of all these uses, as I have struggled to think of more than fifty possible uses for your product and so am obviously missing quite a few.

Thanks,
James

I didn’t have much hope of getting a response to be honest, so I was thrilled when a couple of days later, I saw an email appear in my inbox from someone at UHU. My excitement quickly turned to frustration, however, as soon as I read their response.

Dear Mr. Ward,
Thank you for your inquiry on UHU White Tack. There are really multiple applications of UHU White tack such as fixing posters, postcards, memos, pencil boxes, decorations, photos and much more but we do not have a real list of applications at hand. Maybe our German UHU patafix Web-site (UHU patafix is the brand name use in Germany for UHU White tack) can give you some inspiring ideas of how to use the product in a creative way of which you right now have not thought yet. If you click on “I love patafixer” you will find our 4 patafixer teenagers who really use patafix in a creative way (http://www.uhu-patafix.de/). I hope this will be helpful for you.

Best regards,
Simone

Sound familiar? This is exactly the same story Bostik tried to fob me off with. Yes, I KNOW there are multiple applications for White Tack; as I said in my original email, I had counted more than fifty (this is actually based on the number of uses I had established for Blu-Tack a while ago. I’m assuming all of these also hold true for White Tack as well). I’m not asking whether or not White Tack is versatile, I know it’s versatile, I just want to know if there is any truth to their claim that it has “thousands of uses”. And so it begins again.

Fortunately though, there has been some good news. I feel like I’m really getting somewhere with Bostik. Michelle and I are really bonding. I think it’s safe to say she admires me. Perhaps even loves me slightly. I’m sure she looks forward to my emails.

After her last email to me, I wrote back and explained precisely what the issue was:

Hi Michelle,

Sorry I haven’t had a chance to reply. I’ve been a bit busy, you know how it is!

I thought the artwork you sent through was very creative and illustrates the many ways in which Blu-Tack can be used, but at the same time, it highlighted the precise point I’ve been trying to make all along.

The artwork you sent me describes Blu-Tack as a “multi-purpose re-usuable adhesive”, this is certainly true. My problem is that your packaging states that Blu-Tack has “1000s of uses”. This is a different, and specific, claim. I still haven’t seen or heard anything which backs up this claim. Blu-Tack does have many uses, it is very versatile, but does it have thousands of uses, rather than simply hundreds of uses or dozens of uses? This is what I am trying to clarify.

I noted with interest that another product, WD-40, makes a similar claim, however, they have actually compiled a list of over two thousand applications for their product (http://www.wd40.co.uk/media/images/a/8/LIST_OF_2_000_USES.pdf).

Perhaps Bostik could follow their example and produce a similar list?

Regards,
James

Now, in all honesty, the WD-40 list leaves a lot to be desired. Many of the uses listed are pretty spurious to say the least, and I’ll be raising this issue with WD-40 in good time. For example, I question whether or not this can really be considered a valid use for WD-40:

This seems overly specific:

And surely this:

And this:

Are just specific examples of this:

I didn’t mention any of this to Michelle of course. Some might say I was acting disingenuously, I would say I was being strategic. And I think the tactic worked. Michelle replied today:

Hi James

I hope you have had a nice week and looking forward to the weekend.

I am really glad to hear that you agree that Blu-Tack is indeed a multi-purpose product but obviously disappointed that you do not agree that Blu-Tack has indeed 1000s of uses – or at least maybe you do agree, but want to see these in writing?

We have been asked this question many times before but most have been appeased! – but please bear with me.

The thing is that Blu-Tack uses tend to be so personal and so random to the user that it is hard to identify specific uses. I can only say that by way of the numerous letters and emails we have received over the years stating their uses, that this gives us full confidence that Blu-Tack does in fact have 1000s of uses.

The thing is – Blu-Tack is all about fun, creativity and imagination – this is what we say about the brand. Now if we were to come up with 1000s of suggestions for people then it would kind of take a little bit of that magic away. Also on the same note, we kind of feel that who are we to suggest what to do with your Blu-Tack? I hope that makes sense.

It’s not about stating a random claim just to “big up” our product – as I said we’re a genuine company.

What we have done as part of our website http://www.blu-tack.co.uk is to put an area on the site where consumers can load up their own suggestions for Blu-Tack as well as their models and animations (other good uses for Blu-Tack). Please check it out – I hope you like it.

I was not long ago sent a rather large list of uses by a customer which I would forward however, quite a number of them were not really suitable for publication – but were read with much interest and amusement the team here.

However, having said all this above if you are still not satisfied then I can do something further. This week I spent a day with my counterparts from Bostik Australia and Bostik South Africa. Both have said that they have lists of thousands of uses for Blu-Tack by way of competitions they have run and both said they will send me a copy once they return to their respective countries.

Therefore, when I will receive them, I will happily forward the lists which I hope will then give you the confidence in us that our 1000s of uses claim is correct.

Kind regards
Michelle

I must say, when Michelle mentioned how listing the thousands of uses for Blu-Tack would take away some of its magic, I was quite moved. And such modesty! Even Bostik, the people who make Blu-Tack, don’t want to prescribe how it should be used. I look forward to receiving the lists from Michelle’s international counterparts; but when I get the list, I might not read it. I want to keep the magic alive.

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1000s OF USES: PART 5 – A SHOCKING DEVELOPMENT

I went to Camden yesterday. While I was there, I popped into Central Stationers (163-165 Camden High Street, London, NW1 7JY). Nothing could have prepared me for the shocking discovery I would make:

The problem is far, far worse than I could ever have imagined. Are Bostik and UHU in cahoots? Has this matter been discussed at some pan-industry trade conference? A gentleman’s agreement made over some late night drinks in a hotel bar? Maybe the reason is less sinister. Maybe UHU’s move into the market forced a kind of Cold War escalation of claims. Neither party wanting to be left behind. Or maybe one company arbitrarily picked a number and the other just copied it, figuring both adhesive tacks probably have roughly the same number of uses.

It is of course possible that adhesive tack really does have thousands of uses. I’m not claiming it doesn’t have thousands of uses. I just want to see some evidence to back up that claim. The burden of proof is on them, not me. They’re the ones making the claim, I want them to show me that claim is true.

I will, of course, be emailing UHU to hear their side of the story.

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1000s OF USES: PART 4 – A MOMENT OF DOUBT

I sent an email back to Michelle saying I hoped she had a nice holiday and saying I was looking forward to hearing back from her.

It was nearly another week before she replied. I assume this must be because she was so busy catching up on all of her work following her time off. I forgot to ask her where she’d been. I hope she doesn’t think I’m rude.

Hi James
I hope you had a good weekend – and are looking forward to this one!

Sorry again for not being able to get back to you sooner – we finished our Blu-Tack yellow Marie Curie link up this week that you will see in the press if you look.

Regarding Blu-Tack® and its 1000s of uses. We originally changed our packaging to show this in 2005 and since then have been often asked about it from our customers since.

We are an open and honest brand and company and would certainly not put on a claim we weren’t 100% happy with.

The uses for the product are so random and varying and often unique to an individual that its hard to just identify them all. There are more obvious uses such as using it for modelling, holding wires in place, using for speakers to stop vibration, holding a screw on a screwdriver, using it to remove another piece of Blu-Tack® off a wall. However, to give you a flavour of more random uses – here are some below that we have been sent more recently:

- The University of Cambridge contacted us asking about the softness because they hold insects feet down with it,
- another one (see quote below) about using in the aerospace industry.
- We also had an enquiry from a professor of ear surgery at Leicester hospital saying he told children to use it as earplugs after surgery because it was the most effective method – and subsequently similar by a doctor in Wythenshaw hospital. I also saw it recently in the press about using it in actual ear operations. So just for ears alone it tends to be multifunctional.
- We have worked with the police (they approached us) about promoting the use for using Blu-Tack® for holding Sat Navs in place so there are no marks on windscreens for thieves to see.
- We are also asked many times about different colours than blue and someone asked us for flesh coloured tack because she used it in her first aid course to hold objects on their dummy in class.

We also have a website http://www.blu-tack.co.uk which gives loads of information on Blu-Tack® and also has a section for people to upload all their uses for the product – so hopefully we will have eventually the couple of thousand listed – but check it out!

Finally, a graphic design student sent us in some advert posters this week which I thought showed a funny use on front – and also shows a list of many uses – so here it is attached.

I hope that you are satisfied with our response and will continue to use our famous Blu-Tack brand.

Kind Regards
Michelle

Aerospace enquiry
“The reason for the question is that we use it as a cleaning aid and we then clean off any residues from any remaining Blu-Tack. Our parts are used for sensors within the aerospace industry and any contamination may lead to an issue and we are therefore particular in these matters”

Hmmm.

I’m not entirely sure if I should post the artwork Michelle attached as it’s uncredited and looks like it was done as some sort of design project. Anyway, here it is (if it’s yours and you want it taken down, just let me know. I am nothing if not reasonable):

Now, do you see the crucial detail in this artwork which Michelle appears to have missed? The artwork states that Blu-Tack is a “multi-purpose re-usable adhesive”. I have no problem with that claim. It’s true, it’s definitely true. Blu-Tack is a very versatile product and it can be used in a wide number of situations. I’m not denying that, only a lunatic would deny that. My objection is to the specific claim that Blu-Tack has “1000s of uses”. I am still no closer to identifying what these “1000s of uses” are.

I don’t feel like I’m getting anywhere with this. I just keep getting told Blu-Tack has lots of uses; that it would be impossible to list them all because the list would be endless; that it’s hard to identify them all.

I don’t want to identify them all. I’m not asking for an exhaustive list of every single possible use. I just want some indication that it is true to say that Blu-Tack has “1000s of uses”. Not “lots”, not “many”. “1000s”. They say on the packaging it has “1000s of uses”, show me it has “1000s of uses”.

But how much further can I push this? Michelle seems like a nice person. If she’d been rude and patronising, this would be so much easier. But she seems quite nice.

I went to a course at work this week. At the start, there was one of those “ice-breaker” activities where you have to tell everyone your name, explain your role and responsibilities and share one interesting fact about yourself. I hate these things. There are very few interesting facts about me. Under pressure, I said that the interesting fact about me is that I’m currently embroiled in a dispute with Bostik over the accuracy of their claim that Blu-Tack has “1000s of uses”. When I said this, everyone laughed, but I’ll be honest with you; I think they might have been laughing at me rather than with me.

Am I losing my nerve?

But then, shouldn’t this story give me hope?

Disney is offering refunds to millions of parents in the US who bought its ‘Baby Einstein’ learning DVDs, after being threatened with legal action over its claims that the DVDs provided educational benefits.

I need to be stronger.

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