It is Christmas Day.
I have not opened any presents today, nor shall I. In the Ward household, we have agreed that, in fact, contrary to the calendars and indeed the opening sentence of this blog post, it is not Christmas. It is an ordinary day.
I try not to write about my personal life on this blog, but I am feeling sentimental. My father is in hospital. He has been in and out of hospital (mostly in) for the past month. He went back in last week, and although we hoped he’d be back for Christmas, he had to stay in. “No problem,” I said, “we’ll just postpone Christmas”.
What does that actually involve? Obviously, no presents. My brother and I were going to cook the Christmas dinner this year, however now (in scenes reminiscent of that Morecambe & Wise sketch where Ernie says how shocked he was one Christmas when he went round to Eric’s house at lunchtime and Eric cries defensively “We like kippers!”) we are going to have beans on toast. I also had an idea of getting a digital video recorder and recording the entire BBC One schedule. A simple idea. “You can probably get those recorders quite cheap from Argos” I incorrectly thought to myself, and as a result, two days ago ended up spending a hundred and thirty quid on something which will probably never be used again.
There’s a reason I’m writing this though. I’m writing it for you. This is my Christmas present to you. I want you to realise how important your family are. Despite what I said earlier, it’s Christmas Day. Tell your family you love them.
No jokes in today’s blog post. Normal business will be resumed in the new year.